Crazy Story: The Incident
05.20.05Setting: OfficeMax parking lot
Date: May 20th 2005
Characters: Old Man, Jared, Chad, and The Crazy Veteran.
Story: Today is my brother Jareds birthday. As we rolled into the OfficeMax parking lot in my old man’s F-350, he proceded to swing real wide into a parking spot. As he swung out we heard someone blowing their horn over and over. So he stopped. A little red car zipped between us and our parking spot and parked in a handycap zone. We curse him under our breath and continue to park.
We get out and begin walkin to the store. As I pass the guy while he climbs out, he appears to be an older feller with some dark shades on. While walkin by him, I casually say “Ya know, a one ton truck needs to swing wide to be able to park.” He retorted with some negative remark that I didn’t clearly hear. So my old man got in on it. Dad pretty much repeats what I already told him about big trucks needing to swing wide. The old guy walks to the passenger side of his car, reaches in the glove box, and pulls out a handgun. His wife is freaking out, and begging us to walk away. I gotta admit, I was completely on her side, being currently unarmed.
Things would have been fine, but this ol’ weasel was just lookin for a fight. And my old man was willing to take a bullet to give him that fight. Not exactly something I can say I’m real proud about, mind you. So my old man gets up to the guy and brainlessly decides to give this ol scutter a “tap”. More like a push, on the shoulder. And like anyone would expect, the barrel of his gun was now pointed right between my ol’ mans eyes.
Thats when voices get raised. I yell at the guy to put his gun away. He responds with “He assaulted me! He punched me! Yer under arrest!”. That pissed me off. So I called him a spineless pussy, and told him to put the gun away, and put up his fists like a real man.
Needless to say, he wasn’t up for that. So my dad keeps gettin closer to the guy while telling him to “go ahead and shoot me!”. The guy yells back “I’m a disabled Vet! I’ll blow your F—ing head off!”.
Walter! Hah! Thats it! This guy is just like Walter from the movie The Big Labowski!!!! I coulden’t believe it. I was laughin to myself, as I told the guy “Dude…. This isn’t Vietnam”.
So I told him he got exposed to a little too much Agent Orange, or somethin to that effect. And my dad says “This guy’s never set a foot in Vietnam”.
By now anyone out in the parking lot was running for cover, and a mom right behind the guy grabs all her kids and runs back into the store. And about 20 people call the CDA police dept.
I have to continually grab my old man by the jacket, to keep him from walkin any closer to the guy, while the guy kept screaming “I’m a veteran! Don’t come any closer! I’ll blow yer head off!”. Me and my brother break out our handy camera phones to get a picture of this clown with a Berretta .40 cal pointed as us. At least, thats what it looked like from the size of the barrel. As I hold my camera up, he quickly hides the gun behind his back, like a pansy. Dang it. That woulda made such a great photo. Well… All I got was him holding it behind his back.
So I get tired of this, and grab my dads jacket and tell him to go into the store. Right then the cops all come flyin in with sirens blaring and lights flashing. Now we’re surrounded by police, all with their guns drawn, asking us who has the firearm. Jared is off in the store now, so it’s just me and dad. We point at the crazy old guy, and back away from him. The guy lowers his gun, and sets it on the asphault. We are all ordered to our knees and cuffed. They seperate us and get our stories.
They gather all the witnesses, and after getting everybody’s story, both my dad and the crazy vet were suspects. The Vet, because of his handgun, and my dad for getting in his face. They take the guys gun away, and turn us loose. We’ll see what the prosecuters make of it.
Happy Birthday Jared.
Tell dad, next time, try midol.
# May 20th, 2005 at 12:45 pmwow, im surprised chad was unarmed. BUt yeah, happy birthday jarred
# May 20th, 2005 at 1:01 pmSo, What did ya’ll get at Office Max?
# May 20th, 2005 at 3:24 pmChad, your dad has big kahonas thats fer sure. Oh yea…happy birthday Jared. I’ll buy you a beer next time I see you.
# May 20th, 2005 at 6:27 pmJarrid - I was getting a router for our house. So carrie can get on the interweb, while I kill commies online on the xbox.
# May 20th, 2005 at 7:00 pmAll I got’s to say…it’s only a matter of time.
# May 20th, 2005 at 7:19 pm
You musta been scared for your dad.
# May 20th, 2005 at 7:22 pmWow, not too many people can actually post pictures on the web titled “dad cuffed” and mean their own dad…congrats.
# May 20th, 2005 at 8:23 pmHe pulled a gun on someone just cos’ he didn’t like what he was hearing — the guy needs some serious medication/evaluation and (can’t believe I’m sayin’ this) his firearms removed from his possession — he ain’t fit to carry.
# May 20th, 2005 at 9:51 pmLeyah - Scared for my dad? Not even. After 23 years of this kinda crap, you stop caring. He deserves everything he gets. Anyways.. I was thinkin’ it woulda been nice if that guy winged my old man. It’d be good for him.
# May 20th, 2005 at 10:23 pmAha!
# May 20th, 2005 at 10:36 pmWOW! Thankfully it didn’t escalate. Good on you guys for calling torocaca on this goober. He should have just let it go. Glad you guys are none the worse for it. And Happy Birthday, Jared.
# May 21st, 2005 at 6:59 amSounds like something my dad would do…
# May 21st, 2005 at 8:10 amMy daddy was a hippy and he doesn’t like guns. ( i know right ) I can’t imagine being used to stuff like that!! I know you’re probably gonna kick me off your site for saying this but… I’ve never even shot a gun before
# May 21st, 2005 at 9:46 amI just offer my sympathy.
# May 21st, 2005 at 12:01 pmDumb
# May 21st, 2005 at 5:17 pmheh… hippys. I blame the hippy’s for the messed up parenting that goes on today. with their “free love” and other bs.
# May 21st, 2005 at 11:26 pmI’ll pass that on to my parents
# May 22nd, 2005 at 9:48 amChad…
I blame rap music.
# May 22nd, 2005 at 10:07 amwell yea. but hippy’s started it.
# May 22nd, 2005 at 12:50 pmhow ’bout we blame both?!
# May 22nd, 2005 at 1:34 pmhow about we blame YOU!!!! MUA HAHA!
# May 22nd, 2005 at 3:08 pm
i know! we can blame the: BusHitlerCheneyHalliburtonZionistMilitaryIndustrial-BigOoooiiiiilOligarchalHegemonCabal™ of the Evil BusHitler Oligarchy™ its all their fault!
# May 22nd, 2005 at 3:27 pmbring it on!!!
# May 22nd, 2005 at 3:41 pmCHAD IM DISSAPOINTED AT YOU RUNNING AROUND WITHOUT YOUR .38 WHAT WERE YOU THINKING!!!
# May 22nd, 2005 at 5:00 pmwell. it’s a .357 first off. secondly, i knew the honky wasn’t gonna shoot nobody. he was just in need of some attention, cos mommy never gave him enough. so if i were to pull ol’ emmy lou out, he woulda prolly shot me.
now if i figgered we were in any real danger, i woulda dove behind the pickup truck, pulled that bad boy out, leveled across the hood, and popped a hollow point betwixt his eyeballs.
# May 22nd, 2005 at 5:22 pmooooohh man…I woulda paid money to see that.:cool:
# May 22nd, 2005 at 6:27 pmI HATE IT when one crazy gun-toting douchebag makes the rest of us look like irrational lunatics. Also, playing the “I’m a veteran” card in order to justify irresponsibility with firearms belittles the title of Veteran. Also, I have a quick question: After a stunt like that, will he ever get his concealed carry Back?
# May 22nd, 2005 at 6:48 pmwell. they cant take his license away. Cos he has a right to have it. They just took the gun that was used in the offense.
but yea. one crazy ass clown, sure doesn’t help the rest of us.
# May 22nd, 2005 at 6:51 pmseriously, the dude with the gun should have never gotten it out… guns are for self-defense.. as in when you or your family are in immediate physical danger, not to defend your own stupid pride. that’s very childish and immature.
and that whole confrontation never should’ve happened. “be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to anger”.. i mean, in the grand scheme of eternity… a guy was honking his horn.. so what? just smile, say i’m sorry to trouble you and brush it off. it’s not worth the trouble to irritate someone and really, it’s just ungodly. “a soft answer turns away wrath.”
i’m not saying this to be nasty.. it’s just right.. and i gotta work on humility just as much as the next person… but honestly, this whole American attitude of defending my pride or whatever just has to stop for people who claim to be Christians…. it defames the name of Christ.
# May 23rd, 2005 at 4:47 amAmen Amethyst
# May 23rd, 2005 at 4:50 amThere are some great lessons to be learned here!!! What does God say about it?
# May 23rd, 2005 at 8:04 amProverbs 19:19
19 A man of great wrath will suffer punishment; For if you rescue him, you will have to do it again.
James 1:20
for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God
Pr 26:4
Do not answer a fool according to his folly, Lest you also be like him.
right on.
# May 23rd, 2005 at 8:23 amJarrid and I decided you should have taken his gun and “Monkey Stomped” him right in front of everyone.
And Leyah, If you have never shot a gun before, what would possess you to come to a site named “Pass The Ammo?”
# May 23rd, 2005 at 11:24 amDude thats hillarious he looks exactly like Walter with the shades!!!!! damn only in america!!!!!!:lol::lol::lol:
# May 23rd, 2005 at 12:43 pmYea, I forgot you pack a .357, .38 was the first thing that came to mind, I wish you would have gotten a pic of that guy, that would have been really funny.
# May 23rd, 2005 at 1:51 pmAmethyst and mom…. I heartily concur.
Thats why I told my old man, that when he gets all uppity next time… The honky with the handgun won’t be his problem. I will. Cos I’ll knock him in his gut so good, that he’ll be down for the count.
# May 23rd, 2005 at 4:55 pm[...] bsp; 5/24/2005 Testing Sure Fire says, Pass The Ammo Just testing out a nice little feechur that my site now has. Filed under: Gener [...]
# May 24th, 2005 at 12:55 amYokels and guns are never a good mix, and Amethyst has the best take on it IMO.
Wish the second amendment really meant much though, its writers lived in a time when civilians were more or less just as well armed as any soldiers. Nowadays with the kinds of weapons in military arsenals, civilians have no reasonable hope of standing up to them and the second amendment is only symbolic, window dressing on a changed society where it no longer has its intended effect. The government’s not going to let people keep rocket launchers and tanks on the basis of the second amendment, that’s for sure, much less weapons like submarines and missles and the ultimate, nuclear weapons, even if they could afford them. And nobody’s suggesting they should, so far has the original intent of the second amendment faded away. Just think how crazy the world could be if every yokel had access to nukes.
Instead we only need to worry about a few yokels. Like the ones in Iran and North Korea and Pakistan and India and Israel and so many places where craziness seems to reign. The good news is that they only have a relatively few nukes, not like the tens of thousands that are under the direct control of the worst yokel of them all, George Bush Junior. This guy has already killed thousands of people in a war unjustified in its stated mission to protect us from Saddam’s WMDs, seems like he could make a similarly stupid blunder with his nukes and get many millions of people killed. It only takes one episode of instability, and this character’s a frigging alcoholic, you can’t hardly get more unstable than that.
I see Bush as a far greater danger to the world and to each of us individually than any tyrant in North Korea or Iran or anywhere else, both because he has so many more weapons and because he is at least as unstable and volatile as any of them. We can only wonder how many times he’s had his finger over the nuclear button already, and we just haven’t found out about it yet.
Anybody here ever hear of John Titor? Try http://johntitor.strategicbrains.com or a Google search. Says we should plan for nuclear war in 2015, so if he’s right we’d know that Bush isn’t likely to start one sooner. Nobody knows for sure if he’s genuine though, even though many think he’s got to be a hoax, his predictions are coming true as Bush consolidates and abuses power to bring us a police state. Don’t believe me though, judge for yourself if a police state and civil war either do or don’t start to happen soon.
# May 24th, 2005 at 1:44 amHahah..sorry bout that previous post of mine. I didn’t think it would pop up on here.
But on with the discushun. I’m a yokel. I like guns. I don’t think George Bush is a yokel though. Alcoholic? Where? So I guess you and him go out boozing every night then right? You must be his personal secretary. And how you can even think that Kim, Jog Il over in North Korea is not a “far greater danger” then you must be off yer rocker.
Yer just another one of them liberal loonies with all yer conspiracy theories. No good to America or anything she stands fer.
Speaking of, I’m a soldier over in Korea and I’m fighting to keep people like Mr. Bush in office in order to keep people like Kim, Jong Il at bay. People like you embarass me. Everytime some Korean national asks me why the hell people like you constantly are bad mouthing your own president, I can only say to them, “You have to excuse them. They don’t really know what they’re talking about. In America we have this disease that’s similar to mental retardardation called “liberalism”. We usually just ignore them and they go away after a little crying seesion cuz they dont get their way” (similar to what just happened). So just go sit back on yer couch and watch CNN as you plan out your next “protest” for something gay.
# May 24th, 2005 at 3:23 amWoodster. I enjoy learning about new things and different points of view. People who always stick to their own tend to be narrow minded and condesending. I don’t want to be like that.
# May 24th, 2005 at 1:14 pmDude…….heathyikins……….I’m the ROAD WARRIOR:shock: and I say you just kicked ass. And if any liberal wants to come to Australia and take it up with my double barrel sawed off shot gun, feel free to watch your own face explode.
# May 25th, 2005 at 1:09 pmI know your sister, leslie
I still woulda shot the bastard, just to make it all worthwhile.
# May 27th, 2005 at 8:04 amAnd I congradulate you for carrying a .357 and not a .38.
Yes he does look like Walter
[...] ow Up Chad wrote this 6:36 am: Some of you may recall ‘The Incident‘ back in May of this year. We exchanged words with an aggresive driver and he end [...]
# September 22nd, 2005 at 6:46 amChad, I would really like to speak with you regarding this incident. I have had a simular experience with Mr. Carr and his wife. I am actually one of the obsurd lawsuits in your lawyers file and would like to get in touch with him also….It could be very beneficial to us both. I really do hope to speak with you.
# September 26th, 2005 at 7:15 pm